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Entry the Six Hundred and Sixty First07 November 2004 Distracted Typed up other stuff on the Palm, but nothing complete, so here I sit, at home, on the regular computer, typing away. How old fashioned. ;-) Doing some cleaning today, as per the usual on Sunday. Wasn't in the mood to get going to go swim, so I did an hour of yoga this morning instead. Had forgotten how challenging that can be if you've not done it in a while. My hamstrings might be angry with me later, but they'll get over it. And perhaps if I keep it up, they'll get over it more permanently. Not going to get hopes up there, but it would be nice. So, dragged myself out to a GLAA fundraiser on Thursday and I think I agreed to run for VP Administration. After going on and on about actually using our funds, and getting the word out better via various online lists, etc. I wasn't quite looking like I was from another planet, but I was getting some "hmmm, how do we recruit this guy..." looks. Ah well, the next project, it seems. We'll see this Tuesday when I actually show up to a meeting. Fun. ... I keep trying to write, then getting up to do something else (hang pictures, move the extra door from behind the trick door so the trick door is usable without the extra door crashing to the floor...). This is why I could never work at home, I get too distracted by other things. I need the detachment that my office provides in order to concentrate on work. The election was disappointing, of course, but not unsurvivable. Salon did a good wrap up of suggestions for the Dems to get their act together (and not by going all DLC - the further right we get, the further right they go). I'm not linking it, but it was well written. Go find it yourself. Oh, and I'm going to start posting random pictures from my camera phone on the main countfour.org page. Not using it for anything else, so might as well. ;-p And now I wait for Lawrence to show up for the usual Sunday night ritual of dinner. Eating early with him tonight as he has some work duties (blog editing, I believe) later this evening. Will be good to see him, then home to help Richard edit the stuff for his (hopefully) next job. Not a bad Sunday at all. Archives |
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Entry the Six Hundred and Sixty Second14 November 2004 Stuffed I seem to be spending most of my waking hours these days feeling over-stuffed. I don't think I'm eating that much, but I must be, because I just feel like I'm always stuffed to the gills, at least right after I eat. Yuck. And I'm even leaving food behind now. Ugh. So, yeah, just feeling icky. Which of course feeds into my regular neuroses about food and eating. I've been feeling out of control on my eating, which is never good for my control freak nature, but nothing seems to be working. Every time I sit down it feels like I'm eating too much of late, and I can't seem to stop myself. I need to eat at home, I need to make myself smaller portions, I know all these things that I need to be doing, and I'm not doing any of them, which is partially irritating and partially scary. I hate feeling out of control, especially about something as vital at eating at a time when I'm already feeling bigger than I should be. I feel disgusting, and gross, and just generally blah about my body. *sigh* It's a shame they took Dexatrim off the market, I could use some right about now, to help "reset" my food senses. As it stands, I'll have to just try and focus on portions and reducing the same until my body feels normal again, whenever that is. Archives |
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Entry the Six Hundred and Sixty Third17 November 2004 Goals Since writing that last post I've been doing better with the eating. The evening meal seems to be the one giving me the most trouble now (perhaps because of all the food available here at home as opposed to when I'm at work?), but I've managed to get the other two meals and assorted snacks into a better semblance of order. I'm not feeling constantly stuffed-yet-hungry now. Add to that the fact that I'm upping my exercise schedule finally and hopefully I'll see some results. I decided, in my externally motivated way, that I needed some concrete goals for next year, so I'm looking up races and arranging the associated fees and, in one case, travel. Looking at a 10k and a 10 miler for the spring, and the Rock 'n Roll marathon for June. Ambitious, but certainly doable. First steps there are to lose some fat so I'm not having to carry as much weight on my knees, and to work on some strengthening as we go into colder weather. Started the strengthening tonight at the YWCA (they won out over the work gym for ease of access and towel service), and I already noted the progress on getting my diet back in order. I also sent an email off to a friend of ours who is a nutritionist to start the progress on getting the diet looked at by someone other than myself. Richard and I had talked about retaining her, but hadn't done anything past talk, so this email should prod things along finally. Am interested to see what she says. So, progress of a sort. Once Richard and I set the plans for June I'll have a definite goal to be working on, which will help tremendously. Bit by bit. Archives |
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Entry the Six Hundred and Sixty Fourth21 November 2004 Nutrition As promised (threatened?) Richard has engaged the services of a nutritionist for me. Time to see what can be done to rectify my diet, get rid of some of the gut and try and fix my poor digestive system. Fun. Which means I get to start a food diary tomorrow. Ugh. It shouldn't be too bad, I mean I track every other blinkin' thing that I do, why not food, too? So that starts for a week or so. I'm actually kinda hoping it'll be two weeks as that should give a better picture than just one week. Especially given the holiday this upcoming Thursday. Depends on the metabolic testing place and whether they call me back tomorrow, I guess. All ways of regaining control over a process I feel has slipped out of my conscious control. It's so much fun being externally motivated. ;-) All of which means I've been paying a tad more attention to what I eat, though not recording it yet (perhaps I can put one together for today, shouldn't be too hard...). Thinking can be such a pain, you have to justify your choices, etc. If I hadn't done all this before I'd probably be pretty freakin' depressed about it, but the truth is I know I can do this, it's just a matter of getting it together and executing a good plan for doing it. So there's the next adventure. Along with continuing to work at getting weights into my fitness routine. Did so last Wednesday and overdid it (go fig); was very sore on Friday, to the point of not running that morning because of it. Might have been the combo of too much weight plus the swimming afterward. Will go back tomorrow night, with a little less weight than last week, and build up to this stuff better. Archives |
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Entry the Six Hundred and Sixty Fifth22 November 2004 Food Diary/Sleep Keeping a food diary reminds me of some story I read where someone inherited an estate and the main thing he or she got from it was a diary that great-aunt whoever kept of her eating and bowel habits. Not exactly thrilling reading for anyone. And of course, just the act of recording makes one self-conscious of an otherwise not-terribly-thought-over activity. Which likely skews the results (calorie count, etc.) down. Ah well, am trying to just be me. Tomorrow should be fun - I'm swimming in the morning which means I don't eat until after I swim. Will love seeing what she says about that, but I can't do it - if I eat something first I end up spending half the swim burping whatever it is up. Which ain't fun. I so love my body. The weight workout this evening went well, which was nice considering I did not get a run in this morning. Lack of good sleep Sunday night (too warm, usual Sunday jitters). Tonight will be melatonin and off to la-la land earlier than I've been going. That should help tremendously both with the swim, with recovering from the weights, and with concentration at work. Not been wanting to be there of late, feeling too distracted for some reason, which isn't good since the budget just came down and I need to sit down and go through it soon, always a tedious task, but a necessary one for one in my position as appropriations attorney. Gotta know what's coming up so I can advise folks and not get surprised when questions arise. And on that note, it's off to sleepy-time for me. Archives |
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Entry the Six Hundred and Sixty Sixth28 November 2004 Rational? Long week. Lotsa stuff to think about. Mainly how I like myself without alcohol. Or at least with less alcohol. This isn't about the entry from a while back when I declared myself an alcoholic. I'm not that, I was being overly dramatic, and I don't have an alcohol problem. What I do have are the normal reactions to drinking - feeling blah the next day, not performing as well physically (both athletic-wise and sex-wise, though those are two sides of the same coin). It's just kinda gross, and disappointing to get up the next day not having slept well, or just not feeling up to doing something because I'd had a drink or two the night before. So, blah. So, will perhaps be time to cut down on the alcohol. I don't drink a lot any more, certainly not since that dramatic post, but even having a couple beers leaves me gross the next day, and unable or unwilling to exercise. Which isn't helping the triathlon goal. Or the fat to lean body mass ratio. Blech. Which I'm afraid makes me sound like some kind of puritan or something. I mean, c'mon, I've never done drugs, I've managed to stop drinking caffeine again, I'm cutting down the alcohol. So not the typical gay boy, out at bars all the time, so not the stereotype of the hard-alcohol loving and drinking man. But until I can find a balance where I don't feel ick every time I drink, it might be best to cut the stuff way back. Or only have it with food. Or something. But I need the exercise and the lack of calories more than I need the momentary pleasure. Ugh. It's such a pain being a rational adult. Archives |
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Entry the Six Hundred and Sixty Seventh30 November 2004 Results So I got my metabolic testing done today for the nutritionist. Overall, was not terribly upset by the results. Got weighed on one of those electric impedance body fat scales, in athlete mode. Seems the exercise I do is enough to qualify me for needing that module, not the standard one. Results: 173.8 lbs. (clothed, thankyouverymuch), 14.5% body fat. BMI: 28.1 (Eeck!). Checked my body structure: Large (knew that from the way my legs bulk up). Got to breathe into a meter that checked my resting metabolic rate, basically the rate at which you burn calories when you're being a total couch potato: 2010 calories per day (which means I can eat 2010 worth of calories, be a couch potato, and maintain my weight). Goal weight is at about 155ish for my size and body structure, which is fine by me; the 142 I weighed right after mono was too thin, and regardless of the saying, you can be too thin. So there's the numbers to start with. I've given the nutritionist my food diary and she's working that now. She fussed at me for not including water and I assured her I had no hydration issues; quite the opposite, I'm drinking water all the damned day and running to the bathroom constantly. Is good for you, but is also annoying to have to run to the loo that often. So no hydration problems. She was reassured. I'm looking forward to her recommendations, though I suspect a large part of this will mean a lot more shopping and home prep on my part. Whee! And now (at almost 11 p.m.) I am crashing so I can recover from last night's trash chute fire. Damned smokers, all the more reason to tax the hell out of that crap (don't ban it, but do tax it to death). Archives |
