Of Moose And Men
The Best Laid Plans Of Both Often Go Astray

Survived another week working for the chaos machine that is the US government these days. Go me.

Hopefully I’ll be able to catch up on some meaningful sleep this weekend. Because it sure wasn’t happening during the week. The Garmin watch I’ve been wearing since December gives you a “body battery” score based on how you’re recovering, sleep, dealing with stress, etc., and all this week it’s been in the low to mid 20s. Out of 100. Yikes.

Only plan I have for the weekend, other than sleep, is looking for some walking shoes at the local REI. And maybe some knitting.

Announced at staff meeting that I’m stepping into a team lead role, albeit informally. We don’t want anything formal because then I’d automatically be put into the new employee classification system (as someone who “supervises attorneys”), where otherwise it’s still up in the air whether any of our line attorneys would be placed there.

And I managed to get us a win for the agency with a good suggestion this morning, balancing us between complying with court orders, but also minimizing losses if we’re ever cleared to proceed with carrying out 47’s ridiculous exec. orders. That apparently broke a logjam of dithering upstairs and gave them a safe way to proceed that won’t make everyone happy, but gives the relevant parties something to claim as a partial win. Go me.

Hoping for some better sleep tonight, but not holding my breath.

First off, I’m fine. Don’t you love when an entry starts out that way?

Tuesday morning (December 5th, 2023) around 10:30 I was standing in my living room when I had a sudden bout of dizziness, followed by numbness in my right hand and some tingling on the fingertips. Almost felt like my blood sugar had dropped out (the dizziness) and like I’d pinched something so my hand fell asleep. Both passed very quickly, then the hand numbness came back less severely and stopped again. And then the inside of my mouth and tongue on the right side got numb, at which point I started googling stroke and heart attack symptoms, and drove myself over to the local urgent care center. The symptoms were all resolved at that point, in less than ten minutes, but I still wanted to get checked out. They took me back immediately and examined me, then advised me to go to an emergency room.

Drove home, grabbed some things in anticipation of a long wait, summoned an Uber ride, texted the husband to let him know what was up, and went to the ER at the hospital attached to the university he works at, even though it’s twice as far as the two closest. It also happens to be in the same network as the urgent care center, so they had all of my info from the earlier check in. The husband met me there, the team again jumped in on me pretty quickly – you say/describe “stroke symptoms” and medical professionals’ eyes get big and they immediately start doing things. CT scan that afternoon, then they checked me in that afternoon for an overnight stay for more tests and observation. The poor husband had to return home for the tools to get my piercings out so I could have an MRI, which happened around 12:30am (hospital corridors are much less busy at that hour). Echocardiogram with bubble contrast was late morning on Wednesday, plus constant EKG monitoring and more blood draws than I care to think about over the course of the day.

Tested, prodded, and evaluated, the verdict was that I probably had a “low-impact transient ischemic attack (TIA)”, a kind of stroke-like event that quickly resolved itself. No damage, tests all came back normal, not a stroke, but now I get some new medications (baby aspirin and a statin) and a longer discussion about all of this with my primary care physician at a pre-existing appointment on Monday, at which I was already going to be discussing slightly elevated blood pressure (which has not been helped by the lack of ability to do a lot of cardio because of my knee dislocation in September).

All-in-all I’m doing okay now. I feel fine, and other than needing some more sleep everything seems to have returned to status quo ante. I’m annoyed at the elevated blood pressure and adding yet another drug to the morning mix (I hate that I have to take pills to function), but the results came out well for what happened, and I’m glad I got it all checked out and will get an appropriate treatment plan. And maybe a new doctor to add to the deck? Because as you age doctors seem to be like Pokemon – gotta catch ’em all! Heh.

Afrin for the win, for sleep. I can’t do sleeping formula cold stuff, because my body always ends up fighting the sleepy part, and I sleep worse than if I’d just taken regular medication. The nasal spray, which can be used for a maximum of three days before you get a rebound effect and get even worse sinus grossness, is a good temporary “clear these up so I can sleep through the night while breathing through my nose” option. And it worked like a charm. First decent sleep in days. I still want a nap, but I think that’s just overall feeling run down from the virus now and not lack of sleep.

The latest trick of the little demons kittens is to decide to play with anything and everything that isn’t nailed down or might possibly make noise. At 3 in the morning. For the most part we’ve adjusted stuff in the bedroom to handle this – my wallet and coin dish live in a drawer now, for example – but last night Benjamin managed to find everything in the room that might possibly make noise. Belt buckles. Random paper. Electrical cords. Claws on the drywall (!!!). Ugh. So today is a low-sleep day, which should bode well (not) for meetings at work. Little monsters.

Biked up for errands this morning (dentist, picking up glasses, etc.), and there was a serious amount of stupid on the trail in Rock Creek. No helmet, helmet on but unbuckled (doesn’t do much good if it flies off your head when you fly off the bike…), people running on the left side of the trail, etc. Most annoying. Kinda makes you want to get “Trail Rules” signs like they have on other trails in the area.

Why is it that you say “I’m a triathlete” and suddenly you become all intimidating to some people?

I really, really wanted aero bars on my single speed bike this morning while down around East Potomac Park. File under “you know you’re a triathlete if…” you want aero bars on all your bikes. The instinct to get down on the bars while on a straight, flat stretch was pretty strong. Good sign that training on the tri bike is going well. Or at least has become second nature.

No A/C yet in the building, so while I wait for the cable guy to come by and slap a cablecard into the new TiVo it’s kinda warm. We’ll have it in two weeks once they transition the system over from heat, and I’m semi-okay with this because the new general manager here at the cult co-op is having his guys come by and do a comprehensive sweep and check of all the convectors in each individual unit to ensure they’re working, clean, lubed, etc. First time it’s been described that way (past just the usual “we’re changing the filters”), so I’m okay with delaying to ensure all the equipment is working at peak efficiency, or at least at a better clip than the norm. Having vacuumed off my own units, I have seen how nasty they can get, so I can only imagine what some of them look like. It’s nice to have a proactive manager for once; he’s been big on getting in to do preventative maintenance, which is much appreciated here.

Had plans with a friend to do some gaming, but he got called in to do more on a research project he’s leading at school, so no go there. A nap sounds like a good alternative. With the lack of A/C and temps in the 90s the past few days sleep has been elusive. Lots of tossing and turning and odd dreams, including some disturbingly vivid erotic ones. Waking up at 2 am with an almost painfully raging hard-on from one of those is not conducive to a lot of rest.

I’ve been indulging a crush, which has been fun. I feel like I can begin dating again, that I’m ready for that, with the result that I’ve been keeping my eyes open and my flirt meter at “medium high”. But I also feel like I’m looking more with an eye to finding something more than just casual. As always, nothing is set in stone, but we’ll see where the path leads.

I keep finding good excuses not to get to the pool. That will have to stop soon. Maybe next week. However, the bike and run workouts are going well, and for the most part are happening as planned, which I take as a good sign here in the beginning of training. Getting back into the groove of training can be the hardest part of the training season for me, so I’m liking that I’m getting into the right schedule for it. 8 mile run planned for the morning tomorrow, so crashing here soon to be rested for it.

Today was one of those “OMG, none of the non-lawyers at the BGA can write their way out of a paper bag!” days. Statutory citations I’ll give a very, very wide pass on (since, well, that’s my job to provide and correct them), but basic sentence structure (subject-verb-object), not so much. Things like that make my brain hurt. And there was a lot of it today, as there was yesterday. It’s all a wee bit frustrating, and virtual red ink (track changes) just isn’t as satisfying as whipping out a real red pen and leaving a trail of bloody words strewn across a physical page. Oh, and the next office that asks me where a package is, when the package came in at 7 pm on Friday, at the same time that same office dumped another, 200 page, time-sensitive document on me, I will have them killed. Slowly. With a real red pen. Preferably fountain, with poisonous ink.

The business of every day life continues apace. Laundry was done. The cult’s co-op’s new management team was fussed at over missing notices about impending pest control measures. Talked with Mike. The usual stuff, which is a good thing.

Got caught by a “gotcha” today at work that never should have become a gotcha, but did because of other, more pressing concerns. The joys of too much work, too little time. I think we’re now caught up on it, but I don’t like being in that position, nor do I particularly enjoy putting my boss in that position. Yuck.

Slept poorly last night, a result of a bit over overtraining soreness and late eating caused by needing to run to the grocery store right after running and cleaning up (rather than being able to eat first and then get to the store). Slept in a little, but I suspect I’ll sleep better tonight. Which is good, since tomorrow is my long run of the week.

I got a new pod(people) coffee maker for work, and it’s working out well thus far. Won’t get one for home, I still prefer the French press and grinding my own beans, but it’s a good, and cheaper solution for feeding the addiction at work. It was a freebie via a credit card I hold with otherwise relatively worthless “points” so the sole cost is the coffee itself, which is cheaper then buying it brewed from any of the local vendors. Not bad, though it does cut down on the need to walk out of my office, which is perhaps not the best side effect. I’ll have to take more chances to get up and walk.

For some reason the reintegration back into real life has been a bit difficult. There was the inevitable backup of work at the BGA (“vacation is its own punishment”), breaking things off with someone I’d been dating, adjustment back to east coast time (which means I have to try and fight my normal nature to be a night owl), and just doing the little things like unpacking everything and putting it all away, sorting mail, grocery shopping, etc. Still haven’t done the grocery shopping, so I’ve been subsisting on ever-shrinking supplies of staples from the freezer and cabinet. Not a bad thing, it’s good to clear those out every now and again, but not perhaps the healthiest meals I could be eating.

One thing I’ve been doing to integrate some of our practices from DLOC has been to post “appreciations” over on FaceBook. Just little things to acknowledge those things I’m appreciative of for whatever reason. It does help to make one more mindful of what’s going on in your life, which has made it a useful tool for me.

Past that I’m trying to find my motivation to get back to tri training for my last two races this season, and finish up my commitment with the club’s volunteer work this month. “The Pile” of books has grown since coming back, including some re-reading of classics I feel the need to reexamine in light of the DLOC and SF experiences (The Ethical Slut, the Tao Te Ching/Dao De Jing). I’m about 1/2 an inch from finishing sock #2 on pair #2, and I have another pull ball ready to go on the next set, but the one sock’s been sitting here unloved as I try to work myself back into life.

Picked up another bike yesterday. I wanted something a bit better for zipping around town than my mountain bike (which is a good bike, but not the best for commuting). I went in a slightly different direction, a single gear, and put “campus pedals” on it (clipless on one side, regular pedal platform on the other), so I don’t have to throw on bike shoes just to zip somewhere if I wish to bike out. My goal there is to bike about more to things in town, and sweat be damned. It even came with a kickstand! I feel so retro with a kickstand on a bike – I don’t think I’ve had one of those since high school. With the bike, though, comes the last big purchase for the year, I think. Need to back off and pay off the remnants of vacation and the bike and plan for the end of the year and Giftmas. And to plan for the next body electric workshop next year, of course.

It’s hard to fully describe the changes wrought by DLOC, but I’ll be working on them this year.

My stomach has started the pre-race jitters dance this morning. I’ve gotten up, taken delivery of a chair I ordered a couple months back (and yay for prompt delivery people – window was 8 to 12 and he was here at 2 after 8!), started assembling my race gear, and put the bike rack on the back of the mini. Weather today is sticky, and threatening rain. Tomorrow looks to be cool and damp (arm warmers have been put in the gear pile).

Once I get packet pick-up and bike drop-off done here in a bit, it’s home to finish packing, clean, and generally try to go over the race day and how things are going to go (visualizing transition is a good thing). Get to try the wet suit on and see how tight it’s going to be this year – I’ve not worn it since last July-ish, and I gained a few pounds over the non-running part of last year which haven’t quite come off yet. With it looking to be damp tomorrow I’m glad I got the new, lighter shades. Lighter in terms of tint, that is – wanted something for dimmer conditions like pre-dawn rides where the sun would be coming up, and I’d want some protection once it did, but not the full dark of my normal sunglasses. They’re perfect for this weather, protecting but not obscuring.

Will try to crash shortly after sunset this evening since I have to get up around 4 to get ready and get up to Columbia for the race in the morning. Gonna be a long day tomorrow.