Of Moose And Men
The Best Laid Plans Of Both Often Go Astray

First off, I’m fine. Don’t you love when an entry starts out that way?

Tuesday morning (December 5th, 2023) around 10:30 I was standing in my living room when I had a sudden bout of dizziness, followed by numbness in my right hand and some tingling on the fingertips. Almost felt like my blood sugar had dropped out (the dizziness) and like I’d pinched something so my hand fell asleep. Both passed very quickly, then the hand numbness came back less severely and stopped again. And then the inside of my mouth and tongue on the right side got numb, at which point I started googling stroke and heart attack symptoms, and drove myself over to the local urgent care center. The symptoms were all resolved at that point, in less than ten minutes, but I still wanted to get checked out. They took me back immediately and examined me, then advised me to go to an emergency room.

Drove home, grabbed some things in anticipation of a long wait, summoned an Uber ride, texted the husband to let him know what was up, and went to the ER at the hospital attached to the university he works at, even though it’s twice as far as the two closest. It also happens to be in the same network as the urgent care center, so they had all of my info from the earlier check in. The husband met me there, the team again jumped in on me pretty quickly – you say/describe “stroke symptoms” and medical professionals’ eyes get big and they immediately start doing things. CT scan that afternoon, then they checked me in that afternoon for an overnight stay for more tests and observation. The poor husband had to return home for the tools to get my piercings out so I could have an MRI, which happened around 12:30am (hospital corridors are much less busy at that hour). Echocardiogram with bubble contrast was late morning on Wednesday, plus constant EKG monitoring and more blood draws than I care to think about over the course of the day.

Tested, prodded, and evaluated, the verdict was that I probably had a “low-impact transient ischemic attack (TIA)”, a kind of stroke-like event that quickly resolved itself. No damage, tests all came back normal, not a stroke, but now I get some new medications (baby aspirin and a statin) and a longer discussion about all of this with my primary care physician at a pre-existing appointment on Monday, at which I was already going to be discussing slightly elevated blood pressure (which has not been helped by the lack of ability to do a lot of cardio because of my knee dislocation in September).

All-in-all I’m doing okay now. I feel fine, and other than needing some more sleep everything seems to have returned to status quo ante. I’m annoyed at the elevated blood pressure and adding yet another drug to the morning mix (I hate that I have to take pills to function), but the results came out well for what happened, and I’m glad I got it all checked out and will get an appropriate treatment plan. And maybe a new doctor to add to the deck? Because as you age doctors seem to be like Pokemon – gotta catch ’em all! Heh.

I checked my work phone this morning, mainly to look at scheduling, and ended up taking care of two “emergencies” that people were hopping about this morning, then promptly dumped it on the charger to ignore it once more. They can have my time when I’m back on the clock Wednesday. I did end up having to reschedule a doctor’s appointment because the original one is on the day they chose for out office holiday party while I was out on break. No biggie, thankfully. Still need to find out when my current 90 day full-time-remote status dies (next week, I think). I think I’m capable of commuting in now, but I’ll make sure to take the crutch with me for it.

Ortho at the end of the week. Vet for the cats tomorrow. So I’ll be working Wednesday and Thursday, but off the rest of the week, added to the week off last week. Has been a nice break. Knee is progressing still, but definitely not back to normal. I’m able to bike on a stationary trainer now, so that’s becoming my default cardio. The new Garmin GPS watch I bought in August for running works well with the bike accessories, so at least that wasn’t a total waste.

Desperately behind on comics. Like dozens of issues behind at this point. Even reading 4-5 a day I’m still falling behind because of the backlog. Clearly we have a comics problem.

On the third color of my four-color brioche scarf, finally. Just in time to get more yarn for a blanket the husband asked for (which I’m glad I grabbed, because the plum base he wanted is not showing as available any more on the site).

Xmas is all up, and we’re the envy of our street (which apparently got me added to a group text that I hadn’t been on before). Added some strings going from the roof to the group floor, framing the house and windows (lines from the balcony edge straight down to the top of the garage/front door), and some blinking rainbow candy canes for the front walk. And a manual timer to turn them on at 4:30pm and off at 7:30am, roughly around dusk and dawn.

In my head I was preparing for the worst scenario yesterday, and feeling like absolute dreck yesterday, today, and possibly tomorrow. I went to go get my seasonal flu and covid booster yesterday morning, and in my head I was conflating that with last year, when the husband and I got those and the monkeypox vaccine all at the same time. That three-shot combo laid me out for a day or two, so that’s what I was mentally preparing for this year. The two-shot combo wasn’t nearly as bad. I did end up taking a nap (which the female cat appreciated), but I stayed up to my normal time, no nausea, just a little tired. So yay for that.

While waiting to see if side effects would kick in I grocery shopped, set up soup in the slow cooker (sweet potato & apple soup), and finally seasoned (or in one case re-seasoned) all of my new carbon steel cookware. So it wasn’t like I was sitting around just waiting to feel tired. Should’ve knitted some, too, but you can’t do it all.

Knee is improving in fits and starts. I’m on my third brace now. I originally had a neoprene one from urgent care and a big complicated one from the orthopedist. Ortho cleared me last month to go back to the neoprene one, which was doing okay but started to tear and get stretched out, so just yesterday I got a replacement brace (recommended by the ortho’s office) which I’m trying to get used to, in terms of the fit and how it goes on. I’m also trying to spend less time in the brace, period, because I started getting some skin irritation under it. Slept for the first time with no brace on last night and it did well, but this morning I was truly sore from that and PT yesterday, so took the rare (for me) step of taking some ibuprofen.

The past few days my hands have been sore from overdoing it on video gaming while stuck on the couch. And of course my knee has been sore, because of the very necessary and very much appreciated physical therapy. I don’t like taking a lot of painkillers because they can retard the healing process, so I typically just tough it out unless it’s really obnoxious. Add to that the little indignities of not being able to get around as easily, not being able to grocery shop normally, not being able to drive, being stuck in the house, and my frustration levels were rising. Then one of the cats decided to pee in a way that spilled out of the downstairs litter box (likely due to the husband overfilling it) both last night and again this morning, both at times when the husband was not available to help, so I was stuck trying to awkwardly clean it all up. And with this morning’s mess I went to go get a plastic shopping bag from under the sink so I didn’t have to get my hands all over the pee-and-litter covered paper towels (again) to toss them and discovered we’d given all the bags away to my sister-in-law when she came down and hadn’t gotten any more because I can’t get out of the house to shop. At that point I hit my limit, stomped my good foot down, slammed the cabinet closed and wordlessly screamed at the top of my lungs for a minute or two while pounding the kitchen counter. And damn if I didn’t feel a lot better after that.

Saw my sister-in-law and niece off this morning, after they popped down for the holiday weekend.

Made some homemade pumpkin spice coffee additive last night (1.5 cups sugar, 1.5 cups water, bring to boil over medium heat, whisk in 4 teaspoons pumpkin spice blend and 1/4 cup pumpkin puree, lower heat to simmer for 20 more minutes. Strain through a fine mesh sieve (and cheesecloth, if you have it, to further reduce the solids) and add 1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract. Stores in the fridge for up to a week). Also made toddy coffee concentrate, so had homemade iced pumpkin spice lattes this morning (1/2 cup concentrate, 3/4 cup milk, 2 Tablespoons PSL mix). Was tasty. I’m normally a black coffee drinker, so anything beyond that is exotic for me, but this was a nice treat. And the SIL was impressed, which is what really counts.

PT this afternoon. I have some pitting edema going on, meaning there’s still a lot of extra fluid in the knee, so if that’s still there at the end of next week I get to ask the orthopedist about that. Flexion was about the same as last week, which may be related to the extra fluid at this point.

Short week last week (and weird because of the almost-government-shut-down), short week this week. My new attorney shadow gets here in two weeks; it’s someone I recruited from my old agency, so I know I’ll work well with him. Looking forward to training him on the new agency, and a new area of law, as well as passing off some of the stuff that I’m not as well versed in but that he has much more experience with.

Oooh, we played Uno Flip last night and really enjoyed it. The husband and I own it, but hadn’t played it, and it was quite a fun variation on the regular uno. Both sides of the cards are playable, a light side and a dark side, and every now and again people can make the deck flip from one to the other, which also flips all the cards in your hand. Kept things lively.

Got some more of the Halloween stuff put up, including the green-purple-orange light strings we bought last year but didn’t get up (maybe we bought them at the end of the season on sale? I don’t remember why they didn’t get put up). Our neighbor does a much better job with it than we do, but we outshine them at Xmas. 😉

Physical therapy is proceeding apace. Flexion in the knee is increasing; was 85 degrees last week, 110 yesterday. Still sore as fuck after PT, of course, but improving, which is the point of it all. Trying to concentrate at work afterward is annoying, but since we’re not shut down the panicked mood has subsided there. Heaven only knows what November will bring.

Mostly wandering around the house with just one crutch now, with occasional short stints without any support.

Made out like a bandit for my 51st birthday. I have a lot of Lego art pieces to build and hang now. And cupcakes. So many cupcakes.

Back in January I started tweaking a biscuit recipe for my particular dietary needs (gluten and dairy free), and as of last night’s batch I think I have dialed it in. Cast iron skillet, 8″, and cut the recipe in half with some tweaks, including letting the dough rest for 30 minutes which allows the gluten free dough to rise in a manner more like regular flour and letting it rest for five minutes after baking (thank you for the tips, ATK).

Half-batch gluten and dairy free “Butter” Swim Biscuits

1 cup dairy-free milk (I used unsweetened almond milk)
1 tsp apple cider vinegar
1-1/4 cups gluten free flour (King Arthur, preferably)
3 tsp baking powder
3/4 tsp kosher salt
2 tsp granulated sugar
1/2 stick of margarine (4 Tbsp)

Mix the milk and vinegar and let sit while you assemble the other ingredients (this creates fresh “buttermilk” and gives the acid needed for the baking powder to react).

Combine the flour, baking powder, sugar, and salt in a medium-sized bowl. Add the milk mixture and gently mix all the ingredients together until a moist dough is formed (lumpy is good). Let sit for thirty minutes to allow the dough to incorporate the moist ingredients and get a good rise going.

At the twenty minute mark, preheat your oven to 450 degrees.

At the twenty-five minute mark put the margarine in the 8 Inch cast iron skillet and place in the oven until the margarine is melted, about 2-6 minutes depending on your oven and how cold the margarine was. Remove from the oven.

Pour the dough right on top of the melted margarine and use a spatula to gently spread it evenly across the skillet until it touches the sides. Brush some of the margarine across the entire top of the dough – any bits in the middle without margarine on it will look and taste dry.

Use a knife to cut the unbaked dough (it should be swimming in margarine at this point) into mostly even squares. (It’s fine if they are not perfect squares.)

Bake for 20-25 minutes. Remove from oven and let sit for 5 minutes before serving.

The TL:DR version: 1. No surgery. 2. I dislocated the patella and it snapped back into place pretty much immediately. 3. Lots of PT. 4. Might take up to 3 months to get back to normal. 4. Follow up with Orthopedist in 3 week. 5. No driving.

So after waiting around in the large brace for a week, commuting from the 3rd floor (bedroom) to the 2nd floor (living room/kitchen) and back again, I got an MRI on Wednesday. I’ve had a couple MRIs over the years and this was the first time I didn’t have to get undressed and into a gown – everything but belt and jewelry stayed on. Wild. Saw the orthopedist this afternoon, and the message was better than expected. I don’t need surgery. I dislocated the patella when I slipped, and it smacked the femur, but it snapped right back. The MRI showed where the bones collided. I can’t quite get the knee into full flexion (fully bent), so for now I need to do a lot of PT to get the joint back to full mobility.

The tendon that runs on the inside of the knee is going to be angry with me as we bent the joint. The kneecap normally pulls to the outside some when the knee bends, and that’s going to irritate it. They gave me some prescription naproxen to help with it. I’ve put in a request with a PT shop that’s close (quick bus or Uber ride) so hopefully they’ll get back to me soon and we can start working on rehabilitation. In the meantime I’ll have to figure out how we work this with work, because I think I’m technically out of full-time work from home options, but I can’t imagine they won’t accommodate this since I can’t drive, thus can’t reasonably get to work via car or Metro.

I will say I’m grateful that I don’t need surgery. I’ll happily do PT until the cows come home to get back to normal.

On Monday I was on a grocery run when I slipped on some oil in the parking lot and very badly wrenched my right knee. I didn’t feel anything pop, but I definitely went down and there was a lot of loud vocalizing about pain. On the upside, it’s a shopping center with an urgent care center, so after a bit of denial I leaned on a shopping cart and wheeled myself over to get checked out. I got a brace, crutches, instructions to go see an orthopedist.

Saw my old orthopedist’s office the next day (different doctor; the last guy specialized in shoulders, this one in knees). X-rays did not show anything broken, but did reveal that I have a bipartite patella on both knees, which is probably unrelated, but was an interesting conversation piece with the doc. Got a knee wrap and a stiffer, larger brace to hold things in place better (and boy have they improved since I last wore one back in 1986*). Instructions were to get an MRI and make a follow up appointment with the doc. First radiology place was going to take two weeks (!!!!) to get me in. I booked it, but then checked in with insurance to see where else was available and managed to get one a mere week later (this upcoming Wednesday the 13th, as opposed to the following Tuesday the 19th) a little further out. Definitely a sign that there’s too much demand and not enough supply in the DC radiology market.

In the meantime I’ve been sitting around playing lots of PS5, doing some reading, and a little bit of work. The collection of chargers next to the couch has slowly grown as I’ve needed to charge more devices like the kindle. The husband has been fantastic, fussing at me about letting him do more for me (I’m a terrible patient; I value my independence and hate asking for help). Thank heavens for the internet and videos for “best ways to get up and down stairs with crutches”, which we definitely did not have in 1986. Since this townhouse is a staircase with a couple rooms attached I’ve tried to minimize the amount of up and down each day to once each wherever possible. My neighbors have been good, too, with one graciously getting our car back from the parking lot to our garage, and another bringing a package in for me when the husband wasn’t going to be home until late. We have a slight problem with porch pirates, and I wanted to keep the cat food from disappearing, so I asked her to come drag it inside. The smart lock I installed a couple weeks back came in handy there, as I was able to unlock and lock the door from the couch so she could open the door.

And now I wait for appointments to see how badly I’ve messed this thing up. The swelling is down from the peak, but it’s still grapefruit sized and somewhat warm to the touch. Grateful we installed washlets on all the toilets, because when you only have one good leg to stand on wiping is not the easiest.

* Back in 1986 I was playing volleyball in gym class, went to hit the ball at the edge of the court, everyone yelled to let it go out as it was game point and we’d win, so I backed up quickly and in doing so chipped my thigh bone. I vaguely recalling yelling “shit” at the top of my lungs, and the whole gym was looking at me when I looked up. Teacher felt the knee, nothing broken, so ‘walk it off’ (Poor teacher; this was at the school where my mother was the librarian and I know she felt bad when it turned out to be worse than expected). Urgent care, orthopedist, arthroscopic surgery to remove the bone chips, and a massive leg brace to keep it all straight before and after surgery, which I recall being a pain in the ass to get on/off, with giant velcro tabs. This new one has velcro, but also has quick-release tabs that the velcro connects to, so is much, much easier to remove and put back on. Yay progress.